Satire

5 Ways to Protect Yourself From Corona Beer

Based on years of experience drinking

Photo by Haus of Zeros on Unsplash

Corona is starting to cause mass panic worldwide. Many people are rushing to the local pharmacies and clearing them out of facemasks and hand sanitizer to combat it.

This has been advised against by several professionals in the medical community.

But for some reason, they haven’t mentioned the true ways to protect yourself from this scary contamination.

The 5 Most Effective Ways to Protect Yourself from Corona

1. Avoid other similar substances

There is not much mention of this fact in the newsfeed, and it really should be. It is currently wintertime in many places around the world, and that brings with it the inevitable brew season. The Corona is the main epidemic being mentioned by everyone, but there is cause for caution with similar substances. People should be sure to also avoid other nasty liquids like Budcrieser, Miller Blight, and Milwaukee’s Worst, amongst others.

2. Avoid Mexico

Contrary to many reports in the news, Corona actually originated in Mexico, not China. It goes without saying that if you’d like to avoid…