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How to Buy Condoms in Asia (If You Want to Be Mortifyingly Embarrassed)
Awkward experiences are often the best teachers
Remember back in high school Sex Ed class when the teacher pulled out the banana and showed a bunch of giggling idiots how to put a condom on properly?
I certainly do. I also had the naive idea that would be the most embarrassing experience with condoms in my entire life.
But outside of my more enjoyable escapades involving the prophylactic, I have another memory that sticks out. One that will forever be stamped on my brain. The kind that makes me both simultaneously cringe and smile at the same time, out of the sheer ridiculousness of the moment.
It was the first time my girlfriend at the time insisted I go into the store to buy condoms in Taiwan.
Why Learning Another Language is Important
I have a bit of social anxiety from time to time. And as a lifelong subscriber to inadvertent awkwardness, I tend to avoid situations where I predict I’ll be uncomfortable.
And yet, I chose to live in other countries for most of my adult life. In Taiwan, you can imagine English isn’t exactly a commonplace language for the most part.
Sure, you can find English menus in some stores, restaurants, or McDonald’s that have seemingly taken over the world with their fattening ways.
Those situations are easy enough. Just point at the menu and grunt like an ape until the message is received. While this method does result in some weird combinations of food ending up in your brown bag when you get home, it generally gets the job done.
The problem arises when you need to buy something specific. Getting train tickets can be a problem. Paying bills aren’t any easier. Asking staff for specific dietary preferences has lower chances of success than investing in lotteries as a retirement plan.
But asking for something sex-related — in a country that’s generally conservative when it comes to the matter — is an entirely different story.
